Today, just be...

Today, just be, and be ok with that
Be present, be patient and be kind
Be the fulfillment of your potential
Be honest, be trustworthy and be balanced
Be a husband and father with pride, be a hero

Accept, breathe and hug
Make time, enjoy time

Be authentic, be sincere, keep it real
Be quick to love, slow to anger or react and let the situation be
Be content, share and feel blessed
Be honest, be vulnerable, be strong
Be gentle, be caring, be dependable

Live intentionally and be significant
Patience is a byproduct of turbulence, it is learned

Be in the moment, be in the now
Be the example, be the change
Be the master of words unspoken
Be thoughtful, be a gentlemen, be civil
Be reasonable, it's ok to not be right

Always seek the moral high ground, be the better person
Challenge convention, be the best version of you

Be remembered for being just and fair
Be courageous, be disciplined, be bold
Be considerate, put others needs before your own, show humanity
Be inspirational, be enthusiastic, be unique
Be rational, be practical, be pragmatic, be fun

Be quiet, be alert, be sentient
Be a rock and pillar of strength
Be humble, be gracious, be courteous
Be self-deprecating, laugh and cry
Be active, educated, be well read, be knowledgeable

Listen, really listen, with your heart
Ignore distractions, everything can wait, my family needs me

Be the teller of stories, be the one they come to for reassurance
Be the port in the storm, be the stability and the constant
Be the safe haven, be the warmth, be the trust
Be the friend, be the lover, be the confidant
Be the solace, be brave, be gratitude

Be sincerity, be honour, be valour
Be a dreamer, be the possibility, be the can do
Be the why not, be the reason, be responsible
Be the moral compass, be the moderator, be articulate
Be introspective, be meditative, be calm
Be healthy, be conscious, be nourished

Smile, feel happy and radiate love
Reach, stretch and grow to be your best self

Be ok to try and fail and be ok to try and fail again
Be observant, be calculated, be diligent
Be purpose, make an impact
Be in tune with your environment, be a positive force within your eco system
Be good, be nice, be vital, be gregarious

Be all, be everything, be a little, be a lot
Be creative, in flow, be natural, be curious, be pensive
Be independent, demand justice and parity

Be, and be ok with that
Be loved

JR [January 2019]

Crossfit anyone and everyone?

In August 2016, after 2 years of suffering with constant pain from a torn calf muscle that hadn't healed properly, a friend recommended an Integrative Medicine Specialist who used a laser to repair and heal. Worth a shot I said and off I went hoping to be pain free and running again soon.  Doc made me complete a comprehensive lifestyle questionnaire and then, got real. He said, straight faced, you're not here for your calf muscle are you?  My face clearly gave it away…as I had no idea how bad the situation really was. You're 40 he said, you've got two young boys he confirmed.  What are you going to be most sad about, dying before you're 50 or missing these boys getting married?  Sledgehammer!  Again, my reaction prompted him to continue. Jason, if you keep going the way you are, you're on a fast track to a painful and early death. You're 'untall' for your weight he joked. This comment, his sartorial elegance, belay the shocking truth, I was unwell, my calf was just a niggle compared to what was actually going on.

I weighed 87kg measuring 1.65m (if that doesn't immediately make sense, it means I was very overweight!)  Blood pressure - too high. Cholesterol - too high. Blood sugars - too high. Waist circumference - too high. I had to do something, and quickly. But what, I've dieted before, I've cut out sugar, I've gone to the gym, I've started jogging however nothing proved to be a long term solution nor an immediate panacea.

When I told Sarah, she actually took the news better than I expected.  In fact, she told me she loved me and hadn't really thought about how overweight and out of shape I was. Somewhere, somehow, I veered off track. Having young kids, being terribly unhappy in my job and neglecting my health and fitness has snuck up on me as had the ease of falling into a sedentary lifestyle of weekend braai's with many beers and lots of carbs.

Crossfit she suggested. What? Why? Are you mad, do you know what that is? Do you know that cross fitters are nuts!   I was desperate though, so, I looked into it.  The truth was, I had everything to lose unless I did something different.

I looked up two Boxes (yes, even the terminology is different) One Crossfit box was a well known, centrally located and quite expensive gym.  The response was friendly and professional and the relevant paperwork was sent through along with the invitation of a free trail class.

The second box, one I'd not heard of, seemed much smaller, only 1 coach at the time yet, almost immediately, I felt a sense of belonging. The coach messaged me beyond my initial email enquiry.  Come see for yourself he said, no preconceived ideas, no expectations, just come check it out. I reiterated how out of shape I was. That's the point he replied, that's why we are here, to work with you to get fit and healthy because we all have to start somewhere.  It was clear from the outset, he wasn't simply trying to recruit a new paying member. This guy was sincere and authentic, he wanted to help me help myself with a tried and trusted programme and methodology, an approach that really works.

So, next thing, I was at a crossfit class. Unsure, nervous, and to be quite honest, thought I'd made a bad decision.  But, I was hooked. I knew there and then, immediately, that while this was going to be the hardest challenge I had encountered to date, it was going to prove the most rewarding too.  Fast forward two years, almost to the day and the numbers speak for themselves. Weight loss, 13kg, waist 92cm down to 78cm, cholesterol, sugars and blood pressure all within the safe zone.

Beyond the numbers, I feel amazing. I have my self confidence back, I have a new wardrobe, I am stronger, fitter and healthier than every before. I feel motivated and inspired on a daily basis to get up when it's dark and cold to get to a class.  My boys look at their dad and admire the muscles and love the fact that I can run around with them, pick them both up at the same time and most of all, my lifestyle has become a part of their lives as every day Daddy is running or at gym. I am setting a great example for my kids by including health and fitness as part of my daily routine.  I could never have done this without the encouragement of my wife. That initial idea to the daily support has made the world of difference as it's a time and energy commitment and one's partner often has to pick up some of the slack, which my amazing Sarah has done, 5 to 6 days a week for 2 years! 

But what prompted me to write this blog dear reader?  There are success stories and failed diet diatribes littering the inter web, why read mine (thank you for making it this far)

Well, the reason is, this week, Coach sent me a message, from an advertising agency, looking for crossfit athletes aged 30 to 40 for a car advert. Why not I thought? While I'm 43 and in good shape, I'm certainly not your poster boy crossfit model and I have quite a few gray hairs.  I was called for a casting!  

Coach joined me at the casting, he's younger than me and well, let's not kid, if I could order a physique online I wouldn't return his to sender!

What resonated with me was the message he sent me after I thanked him for all his encouragement, support and told him how being part of his crossfit box had improved my life:

'Would you have ever imagined doing something like that (the casting), that's definitely something you can tick off your bucket list. If I told you two years ago you are going to go for a casting and you'll take your shirt off for the camera you would have laughed at me'. He continued by saying 'Thanks for being awesome and amazing and trusting us with your life and sticking to the process… you did all the hard work…we just held your hand… you are the reason I love what I do'

My dear reader, when you don't realize the dusk approaching or when times seem dark already, listen to your cheerleaders, those who love you, and trust them, for they only want the best for you.  More so, allow yourself to experience something new, go beyond your comfort zone especially when you have a reason, a why, such as your health, your family and your future.

Lastly, trust your instinct. It's a tough old world, life is pretty hectic, fast paced and competitive but there are still wonderful souls who genuinely care for you and who are motivated and passionate about your success and wellbeing.  I feel the benefits of investing time and hard work (incredible effort!) into this journey and I feel like I am making real measurable progress. I have established significant momentum which permeates other aspects of my life.   I'm going to continue, pushing myself, challenging what I thought was too difficult and moving forward.

I'm excited about dancing at my son's weddings, holding my grandchildren and living a long, vital and significant life with Sarah. Thanks to everyone for believing in me, for pushing me to pick up that bar with seconds to spare, to do one more rep and to live. 

@crossfitimpi @newbsdad @coach_t.c @coach_spencer7 @newbsmum
#crossfitimpi #impiwarrior #rondebosch #fitdad #functionalfitness #wellness 

What on Earth is going on?

For those of you who have Facebook accounts, you'll remember the beginning, the first time you joined and signed up and did the mic test... testing, 1, 2, 3, is this thing on, what do I say?
And then we sort of got the hang of it...pictures, pokes, presents, status updates, check ins etc.  Videos of cute kittens, photos of my mates kids, news from around the globe - what a great way to keep in touch with people and the one liner update was acceptable because we knew where you'd been and what you'd done and I could 'share' the same with hundreds of people simultaneously...  we were staying connected virtually, we were sort of together.  But, lately, this cool little social media tool has become the most divisive instrument imaginable.    Never, ever, in my most vivid poorly conceived imagination could I even contemplate a portal that would show gruesome images and videos of death, savagery, destruction, war, complete and utter lack of respect for the dignity of others the very fabric of humanity that should theoretically unite our species

I give up.  I surrender. I don't understand, do you?
I look at beautiful Newbs, I stare into his big brown eyes and see NewbsMum.  My heart explodes when little Thomas laughs, his 7 tooth grin.  I am in awe as I become more conscious and aware of the phases of development and the innocence and purity of their young souls, endless energy and curiosity.  At the same time my very being becomes gripped with an anger, a fury and repulsive hate that I never knew resided within me.   This uncontrollable nauseating emotion is directed at those currently in the media who are carrying out the most abhorrent acts of cruelty. I am struggling to write the words, my hands tremble at the thought of a grown man beheading an innocent, angelic, naive child.  I've just erased a paragraph in an attempt to spare you, my dear gentle reader the unnecessary anguish of having to read about the atrocities going on right now, this moment.  Children, Mothers, Fathers... in a place far away but on our wonderful Earth.

For what?  A differing religious belief? An opinion? A perspective other than yours which if unchallenged would leave you free to live your life as you choose.  Who ordains individuals with the right to determine who shall live or die, how they should be brutally slaughtered or subjugated.   The tragic and glaringly obvious irony is that the very belief that is perpetrating these atrocities is by far the least enlightened of all religions... think about that for a second.... isn't religion supposed to personify and exemplify virtue, tolerance, acceptance and love while the reality is the radical minority is nothing more than savage animals demonstrating a complete lack of intelligence,dignity and compassion.  How can any creature profess to carry out actions in the name of an Omnipotent omniscient being when this results in the extinguishing of another life, an innocent precious soul.

Now please don't think for a moment that I am a devout religious person.  I come from a lineage of extremely observant and proud Jews.  But somewhere along my trajectory into the 21st century, my exposure to secular life and international travel led me to the most extraordinary realization.. people of other religions and beliefs can be good people too.  I fell madly in love with a beautiful person, who I married because of who she is, how she treats others, makes me feel and not only because she ticks certain boxes. What does that show?  Well I think it shows that we're people, that we are a common species, more than an archaic religion made up of second hand stories, diatribe and tales bound in a 'sacred' book.

We seem to be regressing.  Planes being shot out of the sky by missiles, war over land, medieval diseases returning, hate crimes, cruelty to animals & children, abject poverty, starvation, natural disasters, exhausting mineral resources... I could go on.  2014 - aren't we supposed to be at the pinnacle of existence, the very cutting edge of science, philosophy, consciousness and discovery...why then, as a species, as human (un)kind are we systematically destroying each other and clearly demonstrating our inferiority and inability to determine right from wrong, good from evil...the very defining difference that classifies humans from animals - conscience.

I can't help but think that somehow it has to do with our insecurities that is determining our inability to think. What one factor, what one intangible, inexplicable reason is the root cause of this totally incomprehensible behaviour?   Religion. pure and simple, belief that has been distorted into an unrecognisable manifestation.
Most of us remain grounded, sane, rational and reasonable...but it's those radical extremists that the world sees, those that are responsible for those horrific videos.  I should not look, I shouldn't watch the news or read the papers to protect my heart from exuding only love.   But I need to be aware of the damage that certain aspects of religion are doing to our moral fabric of society.




It just makes me sad. It makes me cry and makes my heart sore.  I know that we are resilient and the world will recover, we'll get through this.  But why should so many be hurt and have to suffer?

I am going upstairs right now and going to kiss my boys.  I am going to give my gorgeous wife a hug. And tomorrow I shall smile, be kind to others, do a good deed, help someone less fortunate than me and make a difference because those people, in that far away land cannot win... let's not let them get away with this.

What happened to just being nice to each other!

Where have I been?

Hello? Anybody there? I wouldn't blame you if you've finished your glass of wine, eaten the last smoked salmon and cream cheese brioche and made your way into the night wondering what this blog could have become...fear not, I do as well...

So, where have I been...time literally seems to have shifted to warp speed.  The first and major issue is not only huge, it also begs the question that threatens the very existence of this blog...no longer am I simply NewbsDad, I'm also Thomas's Dad...yes, NewbsMum gave birth to our wee bundle on 15 September ('13) ... so now, do I stay NewbsDad...or, ah well, for the sake of continuity let's push on!

So, I have two kids, I have two sons...I am the father of two children - no matter how I write this, it still seems like I'm talking about someone else...and then to his Newness's name...Thomas.  Well, Newbs started calling our little guy while in utero, Thomas Trampoline and while we had a few other names in the mix, we simply could not think of a better name than the one his brother had chosen. So, dear readers, I introduce you to...Thomas Arran Matthew.

So thanks for bearing with me but I'm sure you'll agree with my completely biased opinion that they are brilliantly cute....I am of course fiercely proud of NewbsMum and well, Newness'sMum...gosh, I'd better come up with something better.

I'll leave you now however I do endeavour to write or blog more often.  You'll never wish you had the peace and quiet back and I certainly won't write daily.  I will also gather my thoughts and compose a succinct, humourous, thought provoking, relevant and perhaps slightly esoteric blog rather than this rambling collection of overtired sentences...hey, at least you can look at the picture of my mini me's if this bored you.

Until then, I remain yours in apology, yawns and anticipation...

Laters
NewbsDad

Fall from Grace?

Newbs is fast asleep, I can hear him snoring softly upstairs as I type. The Mrs is feeling poorly and me, well, I can't help but feel let down. Let down by someone I didn't personally know but by someone I looked up to, admired, respected and considered a role model. None other than Lance Armstrong. What can one say about this man, this giant among men.

Outstanding athlete, a human being struck down by cancer yet his will, determination and character showed us 'mere mortals' an inner strength that caused us to gasp in awe and reverence. 7 Tour de France wins, a host of other races, books, a charity and foundation set up in his name to raise money and awareness to fight cancer, he was the face of Nike, the man young boys wanted to be like. Lance Armstrong epitomised determination, skill, hard work, training and dedication to his discipline to completely dominate the sport.

Until now, he's fallen from grace, parodied by Zapiro in one of his latest comic strips showing him beat Felix Baumgartner to ground in the epic free fall last week while on his bike. 
We all know the story of the recent scandal. Of how Armstrong has been found guilty of doping, stripped of his titles, lost his sponsors and tarnished his reputation and credibility for ever.  That's why I feel let down and betrayed....because I believed in him and wanted him to succeed and achieve.

I've been  been watching Tour de France for as long as I can remember. I would plead with my parents to allow me stay up late enough to actually push record as the delayed broadcast started....sometimes I was lucky enough to be able to watch the first few minutes before being threatened with having my own bike confiscated...I was only 9 and it was an 11pm show!

I idolised these men, these hero's on their bikes.  Delgado, Fignon, LeMond, Roche, Indurain, Hinault, Millar and so on.  These men represented everything pure and sporting about competition. Unprotected, you couldn't hide, just you, the bike, the pelaton, the breakaway, mountain stages, bunch sprints, time trials...Tour de France was like a 3 week adventure movie, I was addicted...so it seems were some of the riders.

I'll never forget the 1989 Tour. LeMond was 50 seconds behind Fignon going into the final time trial
 and he found 58 seconds. How does an athlete dig so deep, maintain an average speed over 50kph and ultimately beat a fellow great cyclist by 8 seconds on the final stage. 8 seconds in over 3000km's of riding in 21 days...now I took every lesson in life possible from that, every metaphor you can imagine:
Nothings impossible, never give up, keep fighting, give it all you've got, sweat and training and discipline and commitment will yield results....

I didn't need Superman or Batman or even 007....I had cycling legends that I looked up to, wanted to be like. But now, I wonder...I'm curious to know whether one man has ruined a beautiful sport for us. Whether he purposefully sought to deceive and cheat in order to have what he knew he could never win by simply being the best through hard work.

I find it difficult to look Newbs in the face and tell him that he can be all he wants to be, that he should try his hardest, work and sacrifice but never surrender his integrity in order to achieve his dreams.  How can I sit here and tell him that honour, trust, values and morals will be the greatest testament to his character when others can simply shoot up, pop a pill, cheat and dope to beat him. Clearly that victory would be temporary and cheaters never prevail, karma and all that...but it's still not a level laying field in the interim.

So where does this leave us.  Do we shake our heads and watch as a mans life falls apart, records will have to be rewritten and our core values challenged. All the while as he maintained his innocence (they tested him 500 times over a decade and didn't catch him nor could they prove his doping) 
The evidence is overwhelming. I am sad for him and angry with him at the same time.

Our very moral fabric has been torn. What's next, who's next? Can we trust anyone anymore, what of those sportsmen who've never succumbed to the pressures, who still believe in winning because they trained harder and sold out to their sport demonstrating total and absolute commitment but never crossing that line into cheating.

They say nobody remembers who comes second, winning is everything, being second is being the first loser. Now that Armstong has been disqualified and has had his titles revoked, we'll certainly need to remember those second place names as they've now finally won that coveted Tour de France trophy...we hope and pray, for the sake of our kids that they were clean otherwise we'll call on number 3...

So, Lance Armstrong, hero to zero, celebrity to notoriety....I respected you, I admired you, your grit and determination inspired me when I was climbing my own mountain stage.

The irony is that I will still be using your name, citing your achievements and failures when I teach Newbs about the human spirit and about doing and achieving anything you set your mind to except from now on....it will be about how not to emulate arguably one of the greatest athletes the world has ever seen.

Laters
NewbsDad